Amber (bloodycake) wrote in justaheadofme,
Amber
bloodycake
justaheadofme

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This post is going out to all of those who were ass hurt over my interpretation of APC’s
“the pet”....

first off, the comment that my post- or my personal opinion- made you sick is just
appalling... thats sad on your part that you for one are sick to your tummy cause I made
the obvious clear to you... so what? youre not a tool fan... you dont like apc? then why the
fuck are you in here? the term “simply tool” means just that... things in relation to tool
and otherwise of it... you see, had you not ever heard the song “pet”? had you not ever
heard the song “eulogy” by tool? I stated the obvious and you got sick because why? your
ass came to terms with the fact that you, yourself, are probably a PET (figuratively
speaking) as well...

the idea of me relating maynard as a “god” himself is just stupid...your ass couldn’t think
of anything else to say so you had to throw out some kind of comment that is supposed to
make me look like a hypocrite when openly and visually I’m not... not once did I say I
bow down to maynard... youre pissed off that you bow your head before your fucking
owner- slave... you see, all my thoughts and beliefs on religion and god and what have
you originated around 8th grade... I started to think for myself... then, fortunately in the
11th grade I found and came across tool and apc... and so I connected to the lyrics and
meaning of the songs of each CD I eventually bought... no... maynard is not my “god”...
maynard is a “god” when its said in a “not literally” form... just as the fact to “praise”
him... (or in better terms to adore and love and maybe for some to idealize)... for all he is
and what he does to help a lot of his fans make it through life... you see, there are many
of us who have been through too much in life, and finally there happens to be a band that
puts all our own feelings and thoughts (about any subject that is) into harmonious
music... and the simple fact that you cant relate- no, not even just relate, but empathize
with that fact is just your simple loss... and because I made the statement that you “pets”
would tell me to go to hell is the only reason why you had to come bitch and complain
that I didn’t use your definition of proper online grammar and the sorts right... you just
couldn’t find anything else that was wrong with my post, why? why, because this is my
opinion....not yours, but mine...

I’ll defend myself by all means when I think the hostile “pet” surely is sleep
walking
and sleep talking... dont come give your piece of mind when you
truly had nothing to slice off... mumbling in your sleep is just out right slow...

and you asked what I meant when I said “I loved myself for this”... well, yes, I loved
everything I wrote down.... I loved the fact that I could so clearly put out what I felt as
true... what I felt was right... the fact that I could make my own choices... the
fact that I could say what ever I felt inside... yes, I love my post... you dont and never
have to like anything I post... you dont have to like yourself for that matter... all you have
to do is accept that not everyone in this damned world thinks entirely like you do... I
wanted comments and other opinions about the song at hand... not that you felt I was
wrong, or hurting you for that matter... I clearly stated that I felt sorry for those of you
who were inclined to being a “pet”, my words are not to hurt you, just to get out what I
feel... you dont have to go around trying to hurt someone’s feelings because they said
something you yourself may actually have seen, but are far too afraid to accept the
obvious and so you have to bash me down to make your self feel better... you can’t just
go around telling people their opinions are wrong... no ones personal opinion is right nor
wrong, just different... but I guess you are asleep in this world, so I would guess
you dont know that do you?

you see I am not even being quite rude here... and no, your comments didn’t make me
feel bad... no you didn’t make me sick to my stomach...why? because I’m very open
minded... I took what you had to say into thought and still I came out wholly sane... why
is it that you feel its necessary to rush your opinion onto mine in the fact to try to “prove”
that mine was wrong... thats plainly stupid... you cant justify your opinions either...

the statement that I cant justify that the song “pet” isn’t about the relation of “god” to his
“people” is just obviously slow, seeing as how I did so in my last post.... maybe its you
who just doesn’t understand... why because your ignorant right? your eyes are widely
shut, and youre too busy counting bodies like sheep to the rhythm of the war
drums...correct? look at that, I can justify this shit with the song itself... damn this is
irritating to have to state my point twice...

unlike you, I actually make sense as to why I joined the communities I’m in... you on the
other hand have no business on being here if you arent a fan of tool or apc or any of the
sort for that matter... your the damn hypocrite if you join a tool community and are
completely blind to their lyrics... you obviously dont listen to the lyrics themselves do
you? I see you just sit around like those other “preppy” imbeciles and say “oh, I like this
song because he yelled and his voice is nice...and the beat is cool” no, you cant justify the
reasoning to like a certain band if you dont even know what the fuck they are singing
about in the first place...

can you possibly give me any other interpretation of the song “the pet” that isn’t of what I
stated it to be? damn, didn’t think so... so now youre mad that I busted your bubble of
what you thought these songs to be... damn, what did you think schism was about... or
Fnema, or the noose, a stranger, eulogy, or judith... the list goes on and on... all of apc
and tool songs are about religion, god, government, morals, or self enlightenment and
healing... nothing is ever that of deathly persuasion.... nothing of “I am your god, you are
my slave, do as I say”... no you damned idiot, fucking slave, fucking “pet”... no!!! their
music is highly positive at times and never too hostile or anything of the sort...

you wanna know why I love these people for what they do? tool and apc? here are a few
songs that I’ve connected with very much... one of which really helped me to go on with
my life... you see life for one hasn’t been a piece of cake, hell it isn’t for anyone, but with
my issues and my own personal mentality, life has been beyond hard to live... no I am not
complaining or saying that it isn’t hard for anyone else, but damn, as an active self
mutilator for about three years, I must say that ive been through much of what some
haven’t... and the things that have helped me to not commit suicide and just plainly give
up on myself and on life period are because of what tool and apc stand for... no not just
because of them, but they are a big ass part of me finding my inner strength and working
with it... being enlightened by these people has taken my life from the pits and brought
me up just a bit higher than before... I admit that I am still in the lows of my life, but
knowing that people can make this sort of music and display it on a creative formation of
harmonious beauty is all worth trying to find a way out of the hole I find myself to be in...
sorry you can do that for yourself... but here are a few songs that have helped me very
much, and maybe then you’ll see that not every thing inside of maynard is bad...
[The Patient]
{vocalizing}

A groan of tedium escapes me, startling the fearful.
Is this a test?
It has to be. Otherwise I can't go on.
Draining patience, drain vitality,
this paranoid, paralyzed vampire act's a little ooold.

But I'm still right here, giving blood, keeping faith. And I'm still right here.
But I'm still right here, giving blood, keeping faith. And I'm still right heeeeeeeere.

(I'm gonna wait it oooout 3x)

If there were no rewards to reeeeap,
loving embrace to see me throuuuugh,
this tedious path I've chosen heeeeere,
I certainly would've walked awaaay by nooooow.

I'm gonna wait it oooout.

If there were no desire to heaaaal,
The damaged and broken met alooong,
this tedious path I've chosen heeeere,
I certainly would've walked awaaay by nooooow.

-And I still may. And I still may.-

(Be patieeent. 3x)

I must keep reminding myself of this... {repeats continually in background...

If there were no rewards to reaaaaap,
loving embrace to see me throuuuugh,
this tedious path I've chosen heeeeere,
I certainly would've walked awaaay by nooooow. ...finishes}
(And I still maaaay. 3x)
And I...

Gonna wait it out.
Gonna wait it ouuuut.
Gonna wait it out.
Gonna wait it ouuuuut.


"The Outsider"

Help me if you can
It's just that this is not the way
I want it so could you please,

Help me understand what
I've given in to all the years
And this darkness I have known

Lying to yourself again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on the faultline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
Come on to this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a bitch, why do I wanna watch you

Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die

Medicated, drama queen, picture perfect, no more legiments
Narcisistic, drama queen, craving fame and all this decadance

Lying through your teeth again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it, put it on the fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
Go to this, why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a bitch, why do I wanna watch you

Disconnect and self destruct one bullet at a time
What's your rush now, everyone will have his day to die

They were right about you
They were right about you

Lying to my face again
Suicidal imbecile
Think about it put it on the fautline
What'll it take to get it through to you precious
Come on to this , why do you wanna throw it away like this
Such a mess, come to this, come to this

Disconnect and self destruct, one bullet at a time
What's your hurry, everyone will have his day to die
If you choose to pull the trigger, should your darma prove sincere,
Do it somewhere far away from here


[Lateralus]
{1:37}
Black then white are, all i see in my infancy.
Red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
Lets me see.

As below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn beyond the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.

Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition, missing opportunities and I must
Feed my will to feel my moment drawing way outside the lines.

Black then white are, all i see in my infancy.
red and yellow then came to be, reaching out to me.
lets me see
there is so much more and beckons me
to look thru to these infinite possibilities.
As below, so above and beyond, I imagine
drawn outside the lines of reason.
Push the envelope. Watch it bend.

Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind.
Withering my intuition leaving opportunities behind.

Feed my will to feel this moment, urging me to cross the line.
Reaching out to embrace the random.
Reaching out to embrace whatever may come.

(I embrace myyy
desire to 2x)
feel the rhythm, to
feel connected,
enough to step aside and,
weep like a widow, to
feel inspired, to
fathom the power, to
witness the beauty, to
bathe in the fountain, to
swing on the spiral, to
swing on the spiral, to

swing on the spiral of
our divinity and
still be a humannnnnnnnn

With my feet upon the ground I move myeslf between the sounds and open wide to suck
it in.
I feel it move across my skin.
I'm reaching up and reaching out. I'm reaching for the random or what ever will bewilder
me.
what ever will bewilder me.
And following our will and wind we may just go where no one's been.
We'll ride the spiral to the end and may just go where no one's been.
(Spiral out. Keep going. 4x)

Reflection]
{there's an echo effect throughout the song, echoes are not counted in the repeats}
{3:43}
I have come curiously close to the end, down
Beneath my self-indulgent pitiful hole.
Defeated, Concede and move closer. I may find comfort here
I may find peace within the emptiness.
How pitiful.
(It's calling meee. 3x)
It's calling meeeeee

And in my darkest moment, fetal annnnd weeeeping.
The moon tells me a secret.
My confidant.
As full and bright as I am, this light is not my own
A million light reflections
pass over me
It's source is bright and endless. She resuscitates the hopeless.
Without her we are lifeless satellites driiiiiifting.
And as I pull my head out I am without one doubt
Don't want to peer down here serving my narcissism
I must crucify the ego before it's far too late
I pray the light lifts me out
(before I pine awaaaay. 3x)
pine away.
before I pine awaaaaaaaay.

{8:48}
So crucify the ego before it's far too late
To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical
And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that's imagined and all conceivable.
Just let the light touch you and let the words spill through
Just let them pass right through, bringing out our hope and reason.

before we pine away. pine away
before we pine away. pine away
before we pine away. pine away
before we piiiiiine away.


no....he is not the “god” who created this world and universe.... but let me ask you
this...who is? there isn’t an answer... just a belief... and I for one am not religious... by
this statement I clearly state religious... religious is simply what it is... religion....

I never stated that I didn’t believe in a higher power... I just am not pro-organized
religion....I believe in thinking for myself, and doing what makes me feel best, believing
in what I feel correct... not what someone else believes or wants me to believe... tool and
apc happened to coincide with a lot of my own personal beliefs... I hold a special inner
connection to what I believe to be what you call “god”... my own relationship with the
force... my whole deal in life is just the fact to believe that there is a reason for this shit...
that there has to be some god damned reason for everything I’m put through, all the hate I
see in this world and torture I see and pain I see... all the hurting I feel and have felt has
to be for some damn reason... weather or not I find out that reason is unknown, but thats
something I tell myself to keep me going, to keep me waking up each morning... and the
mere simple fact that you, the “pet, are so fucking asleep in this world cant see that is one
thing that truly is saddening, on your part....

and I am not angry anymore, I was at the time, but ya know what... I’m not gonna fret
over the fact that you cant use some sort of empathy to accept that my opinion is just
that, my own... cause remember, I didn’t go around demanding that you were
wrong... I did as I pleased and said how I felt, you on the other hand did the same but you
had to be hostile and angry and hurt and try to bash my opinion with stabs of criticism,
I’m the cynic here in my world, not you!
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f--k you can TALK!